


Love Poem

by HEBEPHOH



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotions, M/M, Men Crying, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-02-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 10:54:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22848985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HEBEPHOH/pseuds/HEBEPHOH
Summary: When Taeil confesses it doesn't make everything easier for Yuta.Well, not from the beginning.
Relationships: Moon Taeil/Nakamoto Yuta
Kudos: 23





	Love Poem

Taeil confesses to Yuta after their third date. 

"I understand if you wouldn't want to continue this," he says. They are currently sitting at the table at the cafe near the movie theater they planned to go to. 

Yuta swallows hard and looks away; looking straight into Taeil's eyes feels a bit awkward. 

"It's all cool," he says. "That's not the most important thing in relationships, right?"

Taeil smiles weakly at his words. 

"You just never experienced something like this."

"Exactly," Yuta agrees and takes Taeil’s hand. "We have to try, otherwise we’ll never find out." He looks back at the theater entrance. "Let's go or we'll be late."

Yuta persuades Taeil to do it few weeks later. 

Yuta’s the only one enjoying the process, and Taeil tries really hard. 

Maybe Yuta is offended just a little bit, but he doesn't want to let Taeil know it, and he probably drowns in this. 

Taeil strays away from him, drifts away. Yuta doesn't get it at first. 

It's hard to keep distance when you share an apartment together. Realization hits him when he thinks about how Taeil haven't kissed him in days, and slept on the other edge of their shared bed. 

Yuta would understand if they had been dating for a year, but for two months — isn't it too early to cool down? 

Yuta doesn't know because with Taeil it's hard to, because he doesn't think he suits Yuta. 

But Yuta hopes he at least believed in them. 

Still, Taeil might be giving up at this point. 

Yuta drops a bag he was holding. Absolutely not the right time to stack up his head with this kind of thoughts. 

They were out grocery shopping together; there’s still a couple of floors left till they get back home. But now, in the closed space of the elevator car, Taeil just can't ignore whatever was happening to Yuta. 

He steps closer to Yuta, takes his bag in the hand that was already holding other bags, and uses his free hand to move the bangs away from Yuta's face. Yuta tries his best to avoid his gaze. 

Taeil leads Yuta into their apartment leaving him sitting on the coach in the living room, and goes to the kitchen to unpack the bags. 

Yuta hears him fumble through the plastic bags and then lightly slamming the doors of the cabinets and the fridge to arrange the goods and food they bought. Yuta wipes the tears clogging his eyes and attempts to calm himself down. 

He hiccups a little trying to steady his breath. It's almost funny to him how easy it was to start crying. 

Soon Taeil comes back. He brings a cup of hot tea and gives it to Yuta but Yuta puts it on the coffee table right after, leaving it untouched. 

Taeil isn't bad. He’s probably the best person Yuta has ever met in his life. He's kind, and they always have something to talk about, too. Taeil's responsible and — Yuta won't even deny that — attractive. 

The only flaw Taeil sees in himself is completely invisible for others. 

"Am I that nasty to you?" Yuta asks in low voice. 

His words break Taeil's heart. 

"No," Taeil objects. 

"Then why can't you even hold my hand?" Taeil tries to reach for him, but Yuta shrinks away. The tears are welling up in his eyes once again but he's not ready to drop the topic. "Why won't you cuddle me, why won't you kiss me goodnight?" Yuta shakes his head and continues without even giving Taeil any time to answer. "Why do you keep distance even when we go out? Am I that low in your eyes?"

"You know it’s not that," Taeil protests; Yuta just shrugs. 

"If it’s so, then why do you think I wouldn't wish to be with you? That I’d need something more than you in my life?" Yuta doesn't understand at all. "Why do you think that all I need in a relationship is just sex? Why didn't I run away from you after all these months then? Why are you scared to even touch me, thinking that I'd want more afterwards?" 

Yuta swallows. 

His voice is faltering and he crumples his clothes to hide the way his fingers are trembling. 

He ignores his tears and looks straight into Taeil's eyes, asking:

"Why can't you understand that I love you and that I don't want anyone but you? 

Yuta is shaking hard, sobbing in Taeil's arms.

Taeil says he only wishes all the best for Yuta. Yuta thinks that Taeil _is_ the best. 

Taeil runs his fingers through Yuta's hair, holds him on his lap, while the other hugs him tight. Taeil pats Yuta’s back with his free hand, feeling him shiver under his palm. 

Yuta's chin is on Taeil's shoulder, and Taeil listens to his breath. Yuta is tired and exhausted and relaxes in the other's warmth, almost falling asleep. Taeil shots a look at the window to see how dark it already is. 

Taeil slowly stands up to hold Yuta better and bring him to their bedroom. 

Maybe Taeil doesn't deserve Yuta but he just can't let go off him.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for proofreading [Liza](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elizabeth_green)


End file.
